Tuesday

Well, the apartment search is not going so well. We've started looking in Colorado and we may even look in Arizona. We want to look outside of Utah so we can find more opportunities and hopefully grow up some more being on our own. It's so hard to find something that works for us, not to mention our income was split in half with the job move. We can't afford anything really.. I hope we can find something soon.

The military isn't much help either.. until we get all of Adam's court things straightened out they won't help.. but without their help we can't really get all of his stuff taken care of. It's a vicious circle and it's really starting to stress me out. We've only got two weeks to figure it all out.

So, the apartment search is still on. We're hoping we can find an affordable basement apartment or a one bedroom regular apartment.. but it's just not happening for us. We've got so much to do in so little time.

More updates later.

Much love,

Mrs. Gillen

Better♥

Thank you so much everyone for your prayers. It all paid off, he's home with me now and I couldn't be happier. Things have gotten so much better. He no longer has to work in Vernal for the weeks, they moved him to a closer job site, so that is definitely a good thing! =]] This experience has caused us to grow up a lot, and I know that we've both come to realize just how important we are to one another. I can't imagine being without him ever again.

Which brings me to my second subject! The Temple♥. I cannot wait until we get to be sealed together for eternity! That is going to be the most wonderful day of my life! We're working towards that goal every day and I know that we can get there.

On a more every day note, we are searching for an apartment! =] We found one in Provo that looks promising so we're going to go take a look on Friday. I hope it works out, I think that once we get into our own place it's going to feel more real, and we will finally feel like we aren't kids anymore. I have a good feeling about it so let's hope that it works out well!

Once we get settled in our apartment, and Adam has his GED taken care of, we can get into the military. Ere go, we can start making babies! ;] I can't wait to be a mommy. Seriously, I feel like that is really my purpose in life, to take care of Heavenly Father's precious spirits. I am so excited to have that opportunity, and I am praying that it can happen for me. Well I better be off, I'm going to clean our room and it will be a big surprise when Adam gets home. ;]

Love you!

Mrs. Gillen

The Most Horrible Week Ever.

Honestly at this moment in time I really wonder what people are ON when they say that everything happens for a reason.. and that bad things happen all at once but you'll be blessed because of them.

I really don't feel like that's the case, and if it is can the good stuff PLEASE start happening now? I feel like if one more bad thing happens I will just collapse and be done. I know that sounds weak but really I can't stand feeling like this. I'm worried about Adam and I'm scared for both of us, I honestly have no idea what's going to happen. I am having such a hard time with this, and as much as it's hurting me I know that it's hurting him so much more. I can't imagine what he is feeling right now.

I miss him so much that it hurts, I can't even sleep at night. This isn't supposed to happen so early.. but maybe since it did, we won't have this problem ever again. I just.. I can't stand waiting for him to be home. I wish they would just hurry up so I could have him back. I need my husband.. I love him so much it kills me to be away from him this way...I thought Vernal was bad but maaan, this sucks so much more. I want to hear his voice for more than freaking 5 minutes a day.

It worries me because when it was all happening he told me that this was why he has a hard time going to church.. because God does that kind of thing.. It broke my heart to hear him say that.. and I know that every second that he is in there, his faith is fading. I need him to be out, I need him to be with me. I can't let this take him away from me for eternity. Because I know that if he is not with me, I couldn't let myself want eternity alone.

I am praying to God please please PLEEAASE let him come home. Please......

Just Another Manic Monday

Not really though. Haha, today has been quite the uneventful one! Took a trip to WalMart this morning, then came home and I've been here allll day. Haha, but it's been a good one. Spent most of the day reading through my new course syllabus, and since then I've been hanging out with Ashley. =]

I can't wait until tomorrow, Adam gets home and then we're off to the Mullinix family reunion for the week! Very excited to spend it with my newly acquired family!

Sorry there's not much to report today, I'm off to make dinner for me and Ash and watch some movies. =]]

LOVE YOU!

--Mrs.Gillen

Tough Lovin'

Wow, this time away from Adam is really starting to wear on me. I know that it's worth it but it's so dang hard. The worst part is, when I tell Adam how much I miss him he always says things like "I miss you too, but I try not to think about it because I know I'll be home soon", and even though I know he means it good, it makes me feel like he's just pushing aside thoughts of me because he's too wrapped up in what's going on out there. I know it's really not like that, but it sucks not being able to read him in person...and having to interpret his meaning over the phone. Which is another thing... not being able to talk in person is NOT a good thing seeing as both of us have a hard time talking on the phone due to problems such as; bad connection, stupid dying phones, loud roommates, loud siblings, schedules, and the most problematic one..being too tired. So many things make it so so hard for me, but I have GOT to get past it.

I don't know what the actual time frame is on the word "newlyweds" but I'm pretty sure we still fit that category. That being said, I miss my stinking husband. I haven't had a lot of time with him since the wedding with all the work and school that we've been busy with. Now I've got a new job and it seems like they only like to work me on the weekends, which is the only time Adam is home. I really hope it gets easier. No matter what though, I know that we can make it through, I just hope that we can catch a little bit of a break.. Find some time to look for an apartment, and spend some quality time together where one of us isn't SLEEPING. Haha, it's crazy how much we've changed since the teenage years..We used to stay up all night, now we sleep at 8. We are turning into our parents! ;]

Anyway, I just had to get that out of my system. Adam won't be home until Tuesday night so I'll be posting on my own for the next few days. Don't be surprised if the posts are a little wacky insane crazy lady hormonal. It's been a tough week!

Love--Mrs.Gillen